In Bernese “Zwee”, “Zwo” and “Zwöi” translate into two, two and two. That many, no more and no less.
When Ben explained this peculiarity of Bernese he stated that it was “Hohe Schule” [higher education] which I promptly misunderstood. For some reason to emphasize “Hohe Schule” he said it in High German, I understood “Hohe Schuhe” [high shoes]. Which I visualized as “high heels”! Why he wanted to talk about fashion was beyond me. That should have been a hint that maybe I wasn’t really ready for the fine points of the language. At any rate, we got that cleared up and he delved into the particulars of “two”.
Remember, this is very Bernese. I would wager to say that most non-Bernese are oblivious to this particular finesse. In fact, I have learned that many Bernese are also unaware of the correct usage.
Genders
Simply put, the adjective “two” is put in the gender of the object. Of course, that means you have to know the gender of the object. Genders? I’m sorry, but more often than not, I am clueless when it comes to genders. Remember, I come from a language where the definite article is “the”. Not “der”, “die” and “das” [the (masculine), the (feminine) and the (neutral)]. I wasn’t born with the knowledge that the sun and earth are feminine, or that the moon is masculine. In English we say “The sun, it…” not “The sun, she… “ or “The moon, he… “. Because we do say “The man, he…” I sort of figured that “man” was probably masculine. Along the same train of thought, I figured “woman” is feminine.
That is why, when someone said “Lisa didn’t drive here, it took the bus.” I was somewhat confused. Shouldn’t “Lisa” be feminine? Talk about strange. “Lisa” is neutral? Yep. That makes it correct for people to talk about me as “it”! How the Swiss figure out the gender of words is beyond me. It really must be something inborn. But there you have it; I am officially an “it”.
The Nitty-gritty
Back to my twos. Zwee [pronounced zway] is masculine. Zwo [pronounce zwoe] is feminine and zwöi [pronounced zwoi, similar to oink without the “nk”] is neutral. There is no comparable usage in English and it sounded pretty far-fetched to me.
Shortly after I learned the distinction there were elections in Berne. Posters were up everywhere to vote for this, that or the other person. One poster showed two men and had the campaign slogan “Die zwee für bärn” [The two (men) for Berne]. Ah-ha. So this really was something people said.
Now I use it whenever I can. I find I use it quite often with the words “day”, “week” and “month”. I learned that “week” is feminine: “i zwo woche” [in two weeks]. “Day” and “month” are both masculine: “I zwee monate” [in two months]. When talking about something I don’t know the gender of I use a trick I learned many years ago. I use the diminutive. By adding a “li” to the noun it automatically becomes neutral, so “zwöi” is the correct “two”. If the diminutive isn’t possible I do the next best thing, I guess.
Is it Important?
Still, quite possibly you are not alone if you are asking yourself if this is really that important.
When Ben was at the teacher’s college, there was a student in his class from Zurich. Although Züritüütsch [Zurich German] can be a bit hard on tender Bernese ears, it is generally understandable. His Bernese teachers corrected him when he said something wrong like “zwee woche”. Not seeing the point in the distinction he asked why all the commotion about the word “two”? He said “Zwee, zwo or zwöi? It doesn’t matter at all!” Then he held up two fingers and said “It’s always this many! This many!” His teacher, patiently shook his head and said “Ah, but you err. It’s a completely different story if ‘zwee’, ‘zwo’ or ‘zwöi’ are together in bed.” End of discussion.
To make the confusion complete let me take you to the next level and talk about “three”. “Three” is easier than “two” because there are only two ways to say “three” and three ways to say “two”. My chances of getting the right “three” is much larger than “two”. Masculine and feminine are both “drei” [pronounced dray], neutral is “drüü” [pronounced like droop without the “p”].
I have no idea why “two” and “three” are so important that they get more than one word. But it looks like they are. Go figure.
-
-